How did it all start? Men and women were equal. They roamed in jungles and hunted together. They loved each other's company and life was hunky-dory when suddenly kids came into picture. That changed everything slowly and forever.
Strangely even if we are the smartest of the earthlings, we human beings remain dependent on our parents for a long time, both physically and emotionally. So one parent has to be around physically to take care of them. And since the child needs her mother more, women stayed at home while men went out hunt. The more time that the mothers spent at home and with children the more they understood their needs and developed nurturing instinct. The more men remained outside the more they developed spatial skills needed to be good hunters. That's how we human beings remained for millions of years and evolved into who we are now. Women managed home front better than men and men were better outside. Both respected each other for their contributions.
When we started settling in cities, men didn't need to go hunting anymore. Civilization mean that education was the power needed to prosper which both men and women could easily acquire. That's when the battle began. Education put both of them at same level. Both are now equally capable of achieving most of the tasks. So who should stay at home now? Managing families and households is messy. Since women have been doing it for ages they are expected to be doing it like always.
In between something somewhere went wrong and stereotypes started forming. Women were now considered the weaker sex and man started dominating them to the extent that they decide how women should live their lives. What was it that lead to women losing the equal status, I can't pinpoint. Till my parents generation men and women respected each other for what they did. Not anymore. Since women don't get treated fairly now, they rebel.
And anyway why should women stay at home if they are equally qualified? Yes the children do need them as much as in the past but that can be outsourced. So why stay at home and get our hands dirty with the mess. This new phenomenon broke all the rules and changed the situations which lead to our particular evolution. For millions of years what was normal is not normal anymore. Women, as much homosapiens, are equally intelligent and are becoming bread winners much like men. Who is then to be blamed if a woman doesn't want to sit at home and keep doing repetitive menial tasks? Who is to be blamed if men fail to accept women doing as good as them at what was once their forte; if men don't know how to process this change in their head; if a powerful independent woman hurts their ego; if women seeking liberty from being tied to the house gets them confused?
No one. God has created us extremely dependent on our parents that is what started it initially.
But someone has to run the household? Someone has to be around the kids to give them the right values they need to grow into stable and emotionally secure individuals. Who should do it?
First this new scheme of things has to sink into our minds. Sadly we don't have a million years to undonghe effects of the old system. The change is needed here and now. It is just one life that we live and one life only to fulfill our aspirations. And yet something which has carried on for years cannot be undone in a hurry.
But we have to start somewhere. Since women are the ones who suffer the most, and mothers have bigger onus of passing on good values to their children, it is upon us to create an equal environment for our kids in the first social settings for them which is our family. A mother must teach her son to respect women and not to objectify them. It has to become a part of her own value system. How she behaves with other men and women in the house, how others behave with her, everything becomes a standard for her child. And it's not just about how the mother behaves but also about making every child help her in small chores around the house so that the child appreciates how much of an effort is it to keep a house in order and to keep everyone well fed. The father of the child also takes a big responsibility by being appreciative of the mother's contribution, by helping her in the chores, by treating her with respect. But how many men are like that? I assume none at least in this part of the world. And why should they bother for the betterment of humanity going forward. It takes lot of effort to do all that a women does round the clock. They are in a comfort zone, why would they want to jeopardize this position.
Well honestly that's a lot to expect from Asian men at least. Instead of recognizing their importance, men try to dominate women by openly abusing them emotionally, verbally and physically. Just yesterday it was in news that a girl was stabbed by a man from her neighborhood all because she complained against him for stalking her. He was apparently provoked by his mother. And a news from the highly developed nation of Japan where women don't prefer to settle down or procrastinate getting married because if they are not expected to work after they've kids. And if they do continue to work afterwards, they're labeled as cruel mothers. This is really appalling. Because in a society where it is known that a female employee is not going to be working after she becomes a mother, no one would want to take women seriously or groom them for future important roles.
Women will have to rebel and create a level playing field for themselves. And rebel is not easy. It will take toll mostly on women themselves and for a while on children but there is no other way you can teach the society to shake off its prejudices.
Strangely even if we are the smartest of the earthlings, we human beings remain dependent on our parents for a long time, both physically and emotionally. So one parent has to be around physically to take care of them. And since the child needs her mother more, women stayed at home while men went out hunt. The more time that the mothers spent at home and with children the more they understood their needs and developed nurturing instinct. The more men remained outside the more they developed spatial skills needed to be good hunters. That's how we human beings remained for millions of years and evolved into who we are now. Women managed home front better than men and men were better outside. Both respected each other for their contributions.
When we started settling in cities, men didn't need to go hunting anymore. Civilization mean that education was the power needed to prosper which both men and women could easily acquire. That's when the battle began. Education put both of them at same level. Both are now equally capable of achieving most of the tasks. So who should stay at home now? Managing families and households is messy. Since women have been doing it for ages they are expected to be doing it like always.
In between something somewhere went wrong and stereotypes started forming. Women were now considered the weaker sex and man started dominating them to the extent that they decide how women should live their lives. What was it that lead to women losing the equal status, I can't pinpoint. Till my parents generation men and women respected each other for what they did. Not anymore. Since women don't get treated fairly now, they rebel.
And anyway why should women stay at home if they are equally qualified? Yes the children do need them as much as in the past but that can be outsourced. So why stay at home and get our hands dirty with the mess. This new phenomenon broke all the rules and changed the situations which lead to our particular evolution. For millions of years what was normal is not normal anymore. Women, as much homosapiens, are equally intelligent and are becoming bread winners much like men. Who is then to be blamed if a woman doesn't want to sit at home and keep doing repetitive menial tasks? Who is to be blamed if men fail to accept women doing as good as them at what was once their forte; if men don't know how to process this change in their head; if a powerful independent woman hurts their ego; if women seeking liberty from being tied to the house gets them confused?
No one. God has created us extremely dependent on our parents that is what started it initially.
But someone has to run the household? Someone has to be around the kids to give them the right values they need to grow into stable and emotionally secure individuals. Who should do it?
First this new scheme of things has to sink into our minds. Sadly we don't have a million years to undonghe effects of the old system. The change is needed here and now. It is just one life that we live and one life only to fulfill our aspirations. And yet something which has carried on for years cannot be undone in a hurry.
But we have to start somewhere. Since women are the ones who suffer the most, and mothers have bigger onus of passing on good values to their children, it is upon us to create an equal environment for our kids in the first social settings for them which is our family. A mother must teach her son to respect women and not to objectify them. It has to become a part of her own value system. How she behaves with other men and women in the house, how others behave with her, everything becomes a standard for her child. And it's not just about how the mother behaves but also about making every child help her in small chores around the house so that the child appreciates how much of an effort is it to keep a house in order and to keep everyone well fed. The father of the child also takes a big responsibility by being appreciative of the mother's contribution, by helping her in the chores, by treating her with respect. But how many men are like that? I assume none at least in this part of the world. And why should they bother for the betterment of humanity going forward. It takes lot of effort to do all that a women does round the clock. They are in a comfort zone, why would they want to jeopardize this position.
Well honestly that's a lot to expect from Asian men at least. Instead of recognizing their importance, men try to dominate women by openly abusing them emotionally, verbally and physically. Just yesterday it was in news that a girl was stabbed by a man from her neighborhood all because she complained against him for stalking her. He was apparently provoked by his mother. And a news from the highly developed nation of Japan where women don't prefer to settle down or procrastinate getting married because if they are not expected to work after they've kids. And if they do continue to work afterwards, they're labeled as cruel mothers. This is really appalling. Because in a society where it is known that a female employee is not going to be working after she becomes a mother, no one would want to take women seriously or groom them for future important roles.
Women will have to rebel and create a level playing field for themselves. And rebel is not easy. It will take toll mostly on women themselves and for a while on children but there is no other way you can teach the society to shake off its prejudices.
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